Monday, September 22, 2008


James Carlson presents:
A Heroes Rant.
I don't know how much addiction has entered my life. Usually it's more of an obsession. With obsession, it's an uncontrollable drive to do or think about something I enjoy or even love. Legend of Zelda. Half-Life. 28 Days Later. Sufjan. To name a few. I think of an addiction as an uncontrollable drive to do or think about something that I hate.

And tonight, during the premiere of season 3, I realized that I'm addicted to Heroes. Which I hate. The whole concept of Heroes is that ordinary people begin to discover that they're gifted with extraordinary powers, blah, blah, blah, blah. Now, this is all well and good. Some chose to use their powers for evil, while all other characters pretty much just stand around and cry because their powers complicate their lives. Notice I left out the crowd that makes a choice to use their powers for good. Here's one of the major issues that I have with the show. There are no protagonists. As the story sporatically jumps around through past and present, it becomes clear that pretty much everyone becomes a villain at some point, or at least lives as selfishly and as whinally as possible. This didn't really occur to me until tonight as [SPOILERS] Claire tried to kill Peter, Peter killed Nathan, Ando killed Hiro, and Mohinder got freaky.[/spoilers] Sure, it could just be because these characters are constantly pushed to harder and harder circumstances, but wasn't that the Joker's theory? Where is our Batman?! Where is our Christopher Nolan?!
Now, Heroes faithfuls; I know you want to defend Hiro. But that only brings me to my next point: Nobody ever uses their freaking powers! If you had the ability to travel through time, teleport, read thoughts, fly, or heal yourself while an evil beareded man is tearing open your skull, wouldn't you use it every now and then? Especially if you're supposedly trying to save the world? Of course, their was that one scene in season 2 when Peter and Sylar were about to have an epic battle... and the camera panned away. What. Teh. Heck.
As if all of this wasn't bad enough, nothing is ever resolved. Some characters are even killed off, only to reappear later for some dumb reason. That's pretty much all these powers do: ensure that stupid, static characters never die. Instead, new characters and new [lame] plot complications are introduced every episode.
No protagonists, unused super powers, no resolution, no death, terrible acting, horrible writing, no Batman, no redemption... the list goes on... Oh, how it agonizes me how the list goes on...
Tim Kring even apologized for the way last season turned out... That gave me such hope for this season! Stop playing with my heart!
So why can't I stop watching? I think it's because the show really does have potential... Oh, how it pains me how much unfufilled potential there is!! Everything I mentioned just has to be reversed! Actual heroes! Resolution! Death! Sweet battle scenes!
Tim Kring... NBC... if by some freak coincidence you're reading this, let me come write for you! Sure I don't have any experience, but I charge you no thing! I can make those awful characters into true Heroes!


Tharpe Diem said...


I couldn't agree more...and I can't stop watching either...we have so much hope! Or just blindingly foolish optimism.

Now here is where you may want to punch me in the face. With the new Batman movie, I felt the same way...he is clearly more of a protagonist than the heroes, but it still wasn't the same as the stark good vs. evil of ages past, where kids want to BE the heroes b/c of their integrity and choices.

someone did read this, so feel good about yourself.

Jacqueline said...

Your craving for heroes is easy to understand.